Earlier
this spring I had the opportunity to meet an incredible woman, Katherine
Perreth, and her even more incredible son Ben, at a writers conference. I can’t
begin to describe what happened to Ben in just a few paragraphs, except to say
that at age seven he had a massive brain hemorrhage and that event launched him and his
family on an incredible life’s journey. 
That journey was recorded in amazing, emotional detail by Katherine in
her book, Making Lemonade with Ben: TheAudacity to Cope.

I
have to tell you, Katherine’s book kept me on the edge of my seat. Even though
I knew from the outset that Ben had survived—he is, after all, a very real,
very active young man in his twenties today—the way she crafted her story made
it a page turner.  I felt like she was
narrating it to me personally, and I rode the roller coaster of her and her
family’s ups and down as if I’d known them from the get go. But the thing that is most amazing about Katherine’s telling of Ben’s story is her wry sense of humor. While told with heart-wrenching candor, the story was never maudlin; Katherine’s ability to turn some pretty devastating lemons into lemonade 
makes this story a great read on so many levels.

Of
course I wanted to know more about Katherine and what it took for her to write
this book, and what it meant to Ben, so I emailed them a few questions.  They were both kind enough to reply. While I
became intimately familiar with Katherine’s voice over the course of the book,
I was surprised by Ben’s answers. He is every bit as articulate and eloquent as
his mother, but he has his own unique and delightful voice and sense of humor. Katherine’s replies are below. My interview with Ben was posted separately.  

A Conversation
with Katherine Perreth
MCW: Katherine, you write with such voice and passion in Making Lemonade with Ben, but you mention early on in the book
that you once gave up on writing it. What did it take to actually get the book
written?
Katherine:
A phone call from the Madison Children’s Museum in early September, 2011. MCM
asked if I would be willing to write a letter of nomination on behalf of my
son, Ben. The museum was slated to receive a national award in Washington D.C.
and needed to send a community representative. At the same time, the museum
hired Ben – he had been volunteering for over a year as a one-handed juggler. I
figured if they actually did select Ben as their representative, then I would
have the sweet framework I needed to write his traumatic, yet often hilarious,
childhood.
For
three months I chronicled everything, how the trip to D.C. unfolded. I was so
obnoxious with my accuracy that my sixteen-year-old daughter commented
snarkily, “Oooh, look, Mom. It’s another conversation. Better write that down!”
She will also tell you that for 18 months, as I buckled down writing and
re-writing for what seemed like ad infinitum, I wore four outfits. And that
included my p.j.s.
MCW:
What do you hope people take away from your book?
Katherine: One
reviewer said I succeeded in removing the stigma that comes with mental
illness. I’m not sure that’s true, but I’m gonna take it. If
Making Lemonade With Ben can hammer a
dent in stigma, I’m thrilled.
The sooner we
all understand that mental illness is like physical illness, the better. Mental
illness is nothing new, nothing to be ashamed about, is a global concern, and
can be a killer – just like physical illness. We need to fund what works, for
example Yahara House, Madison’s clubhouse model of mental illness treatment,
support and recovery. Yahara House is all about “What I can!”

Making Lemonade With Ben is primarily a love story with multiple threads. In
the 21st century, it’s way past time for stigma. We’re a nation of
can-do fixers, but sometimes we can’t be fixed. Then empathy, understanding,
and love are required.
Powerful good can happen when a
community values all of her citizens through intentional employers and proper
mental illness treatment and support. Ben’s life bears witness to that.

MCW: What kind of reactions have you gotten from readers?

Katherine: “Wow!”
has frequently been the first word in feedback I’ve received from readers.
People have been overwhelmingly appreciative, positive, and expressive –
writing online reviews, tossing me stars on Amazon and Goodreads, and contacting
me via my website and email. I am so delighted, because I didn’t know how the
book would be received and now I don’t have to move to Canada. Although, this
past winter, I thought I had.
People
are shocked at how much they laugh while reading
Making Lemonade With Ben. They expect to cry, given my subject
matter, but are taken by surprise at my use of black, gray, and white humor. As
one of my main coping strategies, I’ll use all the humor available in order to
survive and thrive.
Many
people struggling themselves with mental illness, chronic disability, or as a
special needs family have contacted me to thank me for writing. As have those
who love someone with those challenges. Because I am so vulnerable in the book,
leaving myself feeling like Lady Godiva minus the hair, these words of thanks
mean the world to me. One woman wrote that my words helped her clarify her own
experiences so she could better explain herself to her therapist and family. It
doesn’t get any better than that.
MCW:  What are you doing with your life and work
now that Ben is an independent adult?
Katherine: I
have been delighted to get back into the paid workforce. As a reporter for the
Middleton Times Tribune, I revel in
tooting the horns of my hometown folks. I also continue to lead a reminiscence
writing class for women of a certain age, helping them write their life
stories. Really, their stories should be high school required reading. And
recently, I’ve upped my hours at WESLI, an English as a second language school
on the square. As the behind-the-scenes administrative assistant, I deal in
chalk and paper, oodles of paper, but these days I’ve added culling through
thousands of international student files. Thirty-four years of students. Every
time I finish reorganizing part of the alphabet, I do a jig and drag my
co-workers to the cabinets to, “Behold the files!” (I work with a team of super
women who always humor me.) Sometimes, as with the popular Korean last name,
“Kim,” I take the liberty of dancing early. Took me days to get out of the
“Kim”s.  
MCW:  Do
you have another book project of any sort in the works?

Katherine: I still consider
myself in AA – Authors Anonymous – in book recovery. But that doesn’t mean I’ve
stopped writing. Mostly, I’ve been speechwriting. Recently, I keynoted the
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Dane County’s annual award dinner.
It was a glorious evening. Libraries, faith communities, service organizations,
bookstores, and medical and educational institutions have also invited me to
speak. At the end of July, the UW Department of Psychiatry is hosting me as a
guest lecturer. It is open to the public, I have been told. This year, Ben has
committed to accompanying me, joining me in speaking. People find our
presentation informative, inspirational, and humorous – of course, humorous.

I am also happy to
visit book clubs. Although it’s always a bit disconcerting when I show up and
introduce myself, “Hi, I’m Katherine,” and someone replies with feeling, “We knoooowww!” 
To contact me,
people can email: [email protected]

Katherine Perreth’s book, Making Lemonade with Ben: The Audacity to Cope won the Readers’
Favorite International Book Award for 2013 
in the “Non-Fiction, Inspirational” category. The book is available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or your public library.

Please check out my interview with Ben next!